alien vs. predator megareview, part 4 (2017-present)

what was supposed to be the third and final part of this megareview ended up ballooning to an unmanageable length, so i ended up having to pull a hunger games 3: part 21 and split it into two parts. so here we go.

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alien: covenant (movie 2017)

the origin of humanity is not, in any way, shape, or form, the “only question that matters,” nor does it render any other concerns meaningless. weyland (and ridley scott, for that matter) can fuck right off with that bullshit. i would be willing to chalk it up to weyland being one of the series’ great villains were it not for the fact that the narrative and thematic intent of the film absolutely bear the importance of his fetish out. we also get an acting captain whose entire character is “christians are so oppressed you guys.” ridley, what happened? where did you acquire this ax that you won’t stop grinding?

teenage mutant ninja turtles megareview, part 1 (1984-1998)

teenage mutant ninja turtles, book i (comic 1984-85)

written & illustrated by kevin eastman & peter laird

well, here it is. the comic that started it all. this graphic novel collects colorized versions of the first three issues of kevin eastman and peter laird’s original comics that conquered the world with a merchandising empire that no one saw coming, least of all them.

these comics did include some of the differences i’d always been told to expect from the turtles i’ve known and loved since the cartoons, movies, and video games of my early childhood, but not as many as i expected! true, it is a bit more violent, with the turtles being willing to kill some of their adversaries, but by the second issue leonardo is already telling his more hotheaded brother raphael that the turtles kill only as a last resort.

oh, that’s the other thing. i was primed to expect the turtles themselves to be nearly interchangeable, but they actually have much more fully-formed personalities than that even in these earliest days of the comics! leo was always the honorable leader and raph was always the hotheaded angy boy, all the way back in issue 1! and donnie has been the tech guy since at least issue 2, when he tries to hack baxter stockman’s computers to solve the mouser problem.

alien vs. predator megareview, part 3 (2008-17)

what was supposed to be the third and final part of this megareview ended up ballooning to an unmanageable length, so i ended up having to pull a hunger games 3: part 21 and split it into two parts. so here we go.

🌑🌒🌓🌔🌕🌖🌗🌘🌑

aliens vs. predator: deadspace (comic 2008)

writer: mike kennedy

artist: francisco ruiz velasco

this one-shot was originally packaged with the alien vs. predator: requiem: unrated dvd, and has not been reprinted since then. it’s another one of those kinda nothing one-shots. there isn’t anything necessarily wrong with it? there just isn’t a lot to it, so there’s not really much for me to talk about. c-rank

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alien vs. predator: civilized beasts (comic 2008)

writer: mike kennedy

artist: roger robinson

this graphic novel follows up on thrill of the hunt, and honestly kinda improves my opinion of it in retrospect? actually, nah, thrill of the hunt is still extremely mediocre, but taken as a complete story they’re quite good.