alien vs. predator megareview, part 4 (2017-present)

what was supposed to be the third and final part of this megareview ended up ballooning to an unmanageable length, so i ended up having to pull a hunger games 3: part 21 and split it into two parts. so here we go.

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alien: covenant (movie 2017)

the origin of humanity is not, in any way, shape, or form, the “only question that matters,” nor does it render any other concerns meaningless. weyland (and ridley scott, for that matter) can fuck right off with that bullshit. i would be willing to chalk it up to weyland being one of the series’ great villains were it not for the fact that the narrative and thematic intent of the film absolutely bear the importance of his fetish out. we also get an acting captain whose entire character is “christians are so oppressed you guys.” ridley, what happened? where did you acquire this ax that you won’t stop grinding?

alien vs. predator megareview, part 3 (2008-17)

what was supposed to be the third and final part of this megareview ended up ballooning to an unmanageable length, so i ended up having to pull a hunger games 3: part 21 and split it into two parts. so here we go.

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aliens vs. predator: deadspace (comic 2008)

writer: mike kennedy

artist: francisco ruiz velasco

this one-shot was originally packaged with the alien vs. predator: requiem: unrated dvd, and has not been reprinted since then. it’s another one of those kinda nothing one-shots. there isn’t anything necessarily wrong with it? there just isn’t a lot to it, so there’s not really much for me to talk about. c-rank

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alien vs. predator: civilized beasts (comic 2008)

writer: mike kennedy

artist: roger robinson

this graphic novel follows up on thrill of the hunt, and honestly kinda improves my opinion of it in retrospect? actually, nah, thrill of the hunt is still extremely mediocre, but taken as a complete story they’re quite good.

alien vs. predator megareview, part 2 (1991-2007)

batman vs. predator (comic 1991-92) writer: dave gibbons artist: andy kubert

the brainstorming session at dark horse comics that led to the first alien vs. predator stories supposedly began as a discussion of doing a crossover with dc comics. it didn’t take them long to get back to that idea, with dc’s most popular character unsurprisingly getting the honors of the first crack at one of dark horse’s premier ips.

honestly, my biggest complaint is that although the art style is pretty great (and nostalgic for anyone who’s read any 80s and 90s batman comics), for whatever reason they decided to make everything way too dark, and it’s frequently actually difficult to make out what’s happening as a result.

alien vs. predator megareview, part 1 (1979-90)

alien (movie 1979)

i love this movie.

i love the whole aesthetic. i love the grimy future as envisioned by the late 70s. i love that space travel is slow and laborious, unromanticized. i love that everybody is so dang human without it having to be a character study. just show them unfreezing and eating dinner, it’s not that hard.

i love that ripley is deeply human and an action movie goddess in equal measure. i love that she’s vulnerable in believable ways but shown to be easily the most competent and capable person in this movie and probably basically any other movie. i love that she saved the hecking cat. i know it’s literally the screenwriting shorthand for “this is a good guy,” but i love it here. i love what it says about her specifically. also, y’know, kitty!